Stored in my Heart, Written with my Tongue, Spoken with my Mouth...

I absolutely loved this word that was shared over the weekend at the conference.  Often it is difficult for us not to share what is in our hearts whether it be good or bad.  A way for me to keep in check is to always share my thoughts and feelings with my husband.  Despite that most times his eyes glaze over, he is a great listener. :)  Especially after I turn the T.V. off :)  It is a special thing to have someone you can rely on and have confidence in sharing your thoughts/feelings no matter how silly you think it may sound.  You will never be judged by this person.  Even in my experience, as patient as my husband is, his capacity to absorb as much as I tell him can only go so far.  We are only human and are built with limitations but with God there is no limitations whatsoever.  We have an eternal listener in Him!

Prayer is what connects us to Him.  Just as the land line connects my little family to my parents back home in Auckland.  And yet even those phone calls are few and far between.  Pretty much like our prayers tend to be, if not few, then not at all.

Why is it that I rarely call my parents? I do get very busy, and by the time I get home it's very late.  So I assume that they will be sleeping.  Sometimes if there is a situation going on, I don't want to call them because I don't want to hear what they have to say about the situation.   Especially when that situation is about me :).  But parents will be parents and they are built that way.. to have a sense of checking in on their children.

And just as we find it difficult to talk to our own parents, it is the same with talking to our God.  We don't want to talk with Him because we are afraid of what He may say to us.  It is interesting that my blog is headed with something that is stored in my heart, and my blog continues on to talk about Prayer.  This is pretty much telling me that my lack of prayer is what is in my heart!  Often when I write my blogs, I close my eyes and allow my thoughts to just wander and my fingers follow.  I try to rely on what the Spirit wants me to share, and I think tonight's blog is for me.  Confessing that my prayer life needs to be on the move again, as it did in the times I yearn for His guidance in my life.  There is no doubt in my mind that God has pulled through each time I have called on His name to help me in my life.  So many situations I have fallen to my knees asking for forgiveness, for guidance and He has answered each and every one of my prayers!!! Most of all He has healed me....So wonderful is He!!!

There are many distractions as there always are in our lives, but it's in the way that we deal with our distractions that determines where our path will lead to next.  I know that I can do better. And I WILL DO BETTER!...

In the same way my girls have the discipline to pray each night before they go to bed, so must I.  To have that same obedience again.  To have a heart like a child.  I sometimes remind myself to be like a child seeking her Father in Worship and in Praise.

I'm listening to Hosanna (Be Lifted Higher) by Israel Houghton.  This song was sung by the Worship band at the Conference.  It was such a blessed song to worship to.  At times when I can't find the words to say to God in prayer, songs come to me instead.  When we sang this at church over the weekend, it felt as thought the congregation were in a different place.  That everything else fell away from us, and that it was only us singing to the Heavens.  I took photos of the congregation during worship and it was such a beautiful sight to see.

Having the freedom to express yourself the way these people did for God is so beautiful...I look forward to this Sunday xx

OVERWHELMED!!! xx

I am so blessed by what I experienced over this weekend.  Despite this conference being a business-focussed conference, the Holy Spirit was definitely moving through His people!!!  The Word shared throughout the week spoke volumes to me and reassured me that the path I am walking is one that will lead me to see my Father in Heaven!!!

I have so much to share and don't know where to start.  Dan and I spent the weekend in Porirua.  So blessed to have my parents in town to take care of our girls and spend so much time with them.  It gave us the opportunity to serve and to listen to the Word during this time.  The time we have had to spend with each other and reflect on what we had taken from the conference was awesome.  I love being able to discuss matters at every level with my husband.  We also saw this time as a celebration of our nine years together!  Absolutely blessed this weekend.

Friday night was awesome with our Wellington Youth leading the way with the song "I give myself away" which we sang at camp.  It was awesome, and set the tone for the conference!  The opportunity for our youth to express themselves in a way they could was such a sight to see.  Seeing such a huge group together was encouraging to see.  At least this group of kids weren't in a situation they shouldn't be this weekend.  The kids sang with such confidence and with command in their voice that they were making a stand in saying that they were giving themselves away so that they could be used to do good!

I was snapping pics the whole weekend.  At times I thought to myself, now, you're just taking pics to avoid any Pastors approaching you and ministering to you, but as I began to take photos I could see such emotion, such yearning from people that my thinking changed.  I had always declared my belief that my interest in photography was to be used to minister to people by getting to know them and meeting families with the hope that once they begun to know more about me through my work they would begin to see God's goodness, but this weekend my interest was taken to a new level.  I was talking to Dan last night about what I felt the Spirit was telling me.  We knew there were a lot of people they could not make the conference.  So I wanted to take images to show people what they CAN HAVE in church, in His presence.  In declaring that, the images I was taking changed.  I began to see things differently, with the purpose that I wanted to share with people that church can be an enjoyable place. A place that you can find refuge and peace.  So often you would see photos of people after a conference but you would never see what actually goes on during a conference.  I absolutely believe that God has blessed me with the ability to see things a little differently.  By keeping Him always at the forefront of my mind, I absolutely believe that my images have taken a new direction!

My favourite photo from this weekend I want to share with you is a photo of one Pastor serving another!  I was so humbled seeing this, that it reminded me that no matter what level of seniority you achieve in life, it is important to have a spirit of humility, a spirit of reverence.  I was absolutely touched by seeing this.  I had to share it with this Pastor which coincidentally was someone (and his wife) I used to keep in touch with years ago via email.  I was so blessed to finally meet him and his beautiful wife and share the fact that we had once encouraged each other before, and now seeing each other serving in His ministry!! Truly a God-led weekend!!!

The other photo I wanted to share with you was something that was very profound...watching my husband serving with humility.  I am so blessed that God has blessed me with such a God-fearing husband!!

Be blessed...

Sacrifices...

It's Good Friday tomorrow.  Why do they call it "Good Friday"? *quickly googles the history*
okay I am now informed...basically it is a day of remembrance.  Mourning about our sin putting Jesus on the cross, but rejoicing in that He has risen and that we are saved through the blood of Jesus.

At the start of the Easter period I read a lot of messages on facebook about what people were giving up.  I remember the rituals in my Catholic upbringing about eating only fish during lent.  Amazing that one can be inactive and only going to church now and then but when it comes to Easter and Lent you can guarantee that one will not eat meat on Fridays.

What is it about feeling guilty for not following rituals but there is no feeling or thought to missing church on Sundays?  I remember feeling that as long as I went to services at church I did my duty.  My duty to who though....myself? my parents? God?

An important lesson I had learnt in my Catholic upbringing is that we were taught to really focus on what it is that we were wanting to sacrifice during lent.  Now that I am in a new light, it is something that I do miss.  So taking this opportunity now, what is my sacrifice? my thought pattern started off with thinking about junk food, then television programmes that I obsess about, then onto my girls...I need to sacrifice what I do for everyone else to have more time with my girls.  More quality time.  I have tried to spend more quality time with them over the last week or so, and I see the change in their behaviour.  I was thankful that they got onto doing their chores without any complaints.  I felt really blessed and thankful.

Mother's day is not too far away.  Mother's are a great example of what it means to sacrifice.  Now having two children of my own I see how much parents are wiling to sacrifice for their families.  Faith has such an impact on our lives when we believe in our sacrifices that by doing so will fulfil His great plan for our lives.  I always said that I couldn't be a stay-at-home mum.  Thinking that I always needed to work to earn money to contribute to our family and that by taking care of my family was something that you just do.  I find it really difficult to think that I could stay home full-time.  Accepting that God-willing we have another child I will stay home but until then, I feel like I will stay out of touch with the whole world.  I envy my family who are full-time mothers because it really is such a huge job.  I look forward to the day I will be content in staying home, but for now I will continue with what I'm doing.

Yesterday was our 9th wedding anniversary.  I can't believe how quickly the years are flown by.  Over the years we have been married I am extremely thankful for everything that Dan has done for me and our family.  The sacrifices he has made for our family has helped us to be where we are today.    To God be all the glory for this blessed union.  I am so thankful that we are at a stage in our lives that we can disagree and argue our point and feel safe in that environment.  Dan and I sacrifice so much of our family time to serve in His ministry, but we believe without a doubt that our family will be blessed with what is right for us.  We have had numerous trips together as a family which God has blessed us with.  God has never failed us so I don't see why we should stop serving.

Sacrifice.  An offering. a Worship.  In Honour of this season I leave you with this song "Worthy is the Lamb". Thank you Lord for your Sacrifice xx  your servant

"Worthy is the Lamb" by Hillsong Church

Speaking in their Language..Post #99 :)

Wow this is my 99th post!!

It's been over a week since I shared my last post with you.  What has happened over the past week??  I am currently studying two papers, and have assignments due for both.  I managed to get an extension for one, and frantically tried to finish it before starting the next assignment, when I received a message from one of my lecturers to let me know that I could transfer my mark from when I did the paper last year before I fell sick.  This meant that I didn't have to do the first assignment! There was no hesitation in thanking my good Lord for pulling me through at a time I needed him.  I managed to finish my other assignment half an hour before midnight!!  When you least expect it God will pull through!

I had been blogging about my back feeling some pain and had some blood tests done to check whether anything was in my system.  My doctor called the other day to confirm that my blood tests came back ALL CLEAR!!! I was soooo relieved!  What a weight that was, lifted off my shoulders..or should I say my back! :)...Praise God...for He does have a greater plan for me and I'M GOING TO LIVE IT!!!!

I decided to go to bible study last night as I hadn't been in a while and also because I had recently dedicated myself to preach His Word so I need the extra time to study His Word.  Last night's message came from Luke 4.  My interpretation of His Word came in three parts.  Jesus was handed a scroll in the synagogue in Capernaum.  He read the scripture that talked about spreading the good news to everyone.  He then spoke a proverb and yet it seemed as though they still did not understand so Jesus broke down the message further.  This infuriated the crowd that they lead him to a cliff wanting to push him off and he simply turned away and walked away through the crowd.

I think about my role as a teacher, a mother, a Christian and how important it is for us to communicate the good news in a way that it will be received.  As difficult it is for me to understand intellectuals I'm sure it is just as difficult for a non-believer to understand what I am trying to say about my good God.  Jesus had to deliver his message in different ways which tells me there is no one way in delivering our message about God.  I have blogged about before that we are all uniquely made.  All having our own set of values, thinking patterns, expressions so too must our communication and deliver of His Word.  Lastly our reaction is so important in that when our message is not understood, we don't give up or lash out to non-believers we simply turn away and walk through the crowd...and choose another day to revisit your message.

I really enjoyed last night's message and what was spoken to me during the bible study.  I enjoy the open discussion.  It is always interesting to hear others perspectives on the message.  It opens my mind and my heart to receiving what God puts in the hearts of his children.

I look forward to the awesome messages that will be shared this weekend as we draw close to Easter!

Hope you have a good weekend too!!! xx

My Heart's One Desire...

I'm writing this blog while my husband sits with me singing "As the deer panteth for the water"...it's a beautiful hymn...My sister (in-law) sang it today at church, which I think was the first time she sang on her own with Dan...and it was such a blessing to listen to.  When Dan told me what song he and Liz were going to sing, I thought...argh! an old school hymn.  But I was so blessed listening to it today.  I was really put in my place after hearing it today.  We have all had the mind set of "oh no not that song", or "oh no not church again"...but until you make the experience "your own", you will always limit the experiences you have.

Oh wow I just found another song on youtube that my husband and I sang on our wedding day "There is none like you".  Such a beautiful song...

I really enjoyed our services today.  The messages shared in Sunday school and both services today were awesome.  Very much thought provoking.  This morning I taught my class about Jacob's dream in Genesis.  I was surprised at how much my class knew already.   We shared the kinds of dreams we have and I was reminded of a very vivid dream I had years ago about heaven.  Being able to see a stairway to Heaven, very much like in Jacob's dream.  I remember seeing a beautiful white castle, glistening in the sun.  I thought that had to be heaven.  I still remember the detail of that castle even now.

The end of the scripture talked about Jacob giving a tenth back to God for the blessings that he and his descendants will receive as God promised.  I went on to explain what that meant to my kids.  I think at a young age the lesson in giving to others is so important.  It's the act of selflessness that truly opens your eyes to humbleness and to a world that is beyond your own.  This morning's word continued that message.

The evening service was awesome.  Tonight's message came in Acts where during a storm Paul encourages his men to stay on the ship in order to be saved.  I am reminded that by sticking with my Lord, my life will be filled with love, forgiveness, humility and ultimately salvation.  The scripture about Paul was like that of Noah where God had told him to prepare for the storm and build an ark.  Not knowing what an ark looked like, Noah moved on faith and built the ark in time for his family to be saved.  These were examples of the decisions we need to make in our lives in order to be saved.  Parents were encouraged to lead the way for their children.  I am thankful that my girls understand why we serve a Mighty God.  I think about the message that Ps. Brian Houston spoke about starting our Christian walks is easy, it's maintaining our walks, our christian lives, that is hard.  That is where the challenge lies.  As a mother, I need to be sure of my relationship with my daughters.  One that is complete with honesty and love.  Leading the way for my girls through my example.

We've been blessed with more families joining us at church.  It has made me feel very proud as one of my kids in my class this morning described how she feels about church.  Proud that our church environment is one that our congregation feel safe in inviting others to come along and to share in the goodness that we feel every Sunday.  We are stepping outside of our comfort zones to allow for others to be a part of our worship.  I've had other youth ask me about their friends wanting to come along to church but was afraid of how they should dress.  That their dress sense would not be acceptable in our churches.  How sad it is for our young people or even older generation to feel that they will not be accepted because of who they are as a person.  Our God sees beyond the labels, beyond the piercings, beyond the outter shell to the spirit within you.  It should be encouraged for others to come as they are.  It will be in time that they will understand their environment and change at their pace and at God's.

It is going to be a very busy week this week with assignments due, work projects, interviews, my family responsibilities.  I have my appointment scheduled for Tuesday and I will pray very hard that the uneasiness I feel is something minor like the flu.  With the awesome messages I have heard today, I am encouraged to stay true to my walk, having faith that God is always with me, in every decision that I make.

I shed a few tears when Dan & Liz sang their song today.  Especially when the chorus was sung.  "You alone are my strength my shield, To you alone may my spirit yield, You alone are my hearts desire, and I long to worship thee"  How beautiful it was to close my eyes and mediate on those words alone.  With what I am going through physically, I was reminded that God is my strength.  He is my hearts one desire and I will ALWAYS LONG TO WORSHIP THEE....

Have a blessed week everyone xx

Having an Overcoming Spirit...

Amazing that when your heart is opening to receiving a message, you will really hear it.

I listened to Brian Houston's message (Pastor of Hillsong) about having an overcoming spirit.  You will understand from my previous posts that I have been thinking lately about making some changes in my life for the sake of my health.  I have spoken to some close friends and family and have gotten some great advice.  In listening to Ps. Brian's message he talks about having the kind of spirit that can overcome any obstacle that you come across in your life.  There is no doubt about the obstacle I'm facing at the moment, but what a strong message in that alone....having an OVERCOMING SPIRIT!  We are made for so much more and to settle for 2nd best, to me, is saying that you don't deserve to give yourself a chance at something better.

I have family asking me where do I find the time to do things.  My answer is always...I DON'T HAVE THE TIME, I JUST GET ON WITH IT...I am always overlapping priorities or everything is a priority.  I don't think I am a "yes" person, however my actions say otherwise.  I'd like to think that I can say No, but putting into practice is another thing.  I refuse to allow my service to God be a "bother" to me and my family.  I believe strongly that every moment counts in His book.  But I am thankful that He has given me the awareness to pick up on situations that are not quite right.

Having an Overcoming Spirit....Ps. Brian goes on further to talk about Galatians 6:9 where it talks about not growing weary in doing good but we will reap the rewards as long as we do not give up.  Understanding this scripture I felt a spirit of peace come over me.  Do not grow weary.  Don't worry.  Everything will be fine.  Just focus more on God and what His plan is for me and everything will fall into place.

Today watching a pre-recorded episode of American Idol, there was something in what Jennifer Lopez said to a contestant that made a lot of sense to me.  Last week a contestant was sent home, but the judges stepped in and used their one and only save to keep him in the competition.  I was soooo happy because this kid is awesome!!!  But what she said in last night's show was about other very talented contestants were sent home and she lost sleep over that.  But their (judges) decision to use their only save to keep Casey on was a decision that helped her to sleep through the night again.  How wonderful was that!  to be able to make a decision in your life where you would be able to sleep peacefully!!!....

Since delivering my message at camp some weeks ago about making a decision that will change your life, my spirit has been stirring so much about the decisions I need to make in my life.  Most importantly the decision to take care of me...my health.   This is so hard.  I spoke to my dad the other night.  He shared with me in a very stern voice I might add, his concern for me taking on too much.  He said to me that when we go up to Auckland to visit, I should be resting but instead I work (my photography gig)...I know I do create a lot of work for myself...but it's things that I really enjoy.  I am looking forward to the message tomorrow at church, I am expecting more "spiritual advice" to help me with making the right decisions for me and my family.

In the meantime...I will head back to finishing off my chores and then working on my assignment due next week. :)  It's such a beautiful day today....

Watch this space for some great messages I will share with you... xx