Wow!!!! I have re-read your comments!!!

As I start my journey through this 12 week challenge ...and then the next 12, and the final 12 weeks :P, I read through all the comments I have received from families and friends after reading this blog.  I am truly blessed and overwhelmed by such loving and encouraging words!

A lot of times when we go through challenges in life, we can downgrade our value but when you receive loving messages like I did while I was sick it is such an uplifting experience!! To feel loved in that way and to feel like you really are making an impact on people's lives.  Even if it is a whole lot of rambling on my part.

So thank you, thank you, thank you!! Your words even now continue to help me.

I am inspired again to continue writing this blog and record this new journey in my life to finding a healthier me in body and in spirit!!!

Great message today!!

Really enjoyed today's message...."Who is Jesus to me?".  Had me thinking about whether my behaviour, attitudes reflects who Jesus is to me?  Then with this 12 week challenge going on, I thought, well I know my outter being is not reflecting who Jesus is to me, in that I have really let go, and let loose! :/ but I am making a change.  Our church is going through this 12 week challenge which surprisingly there has been very little resistance given that we are mostly a pacific island church community.  But our message this year is about God making a way for us, and this is what I know is happening for me so far.  Even in these early stages of the competition I had prayed for an opportunity to improve my health and now we have the opportunity as a church to run this programme...not once...but THREE TIMES this year!!! Now how's that for God making a way for us!!!

This past week has been one of testing relationships and I am glad to say that when your relationships are founded on God then all things will happen!!!  God has really made a way for me and my sisters (in-law) to be closer and to work together better.  I am reminded again, that everyone is different, and have come from different backgrounds.  Until you can acknowledge and accept that you may never be able to move forward.  Trusting in what you cannot see is what big Faith is all about!!!  We can never see what will happen in our lives in 5 to 10 years time, but God can see all things and He sees that it is good!!!

This week is the start of our 12 week challenge.  I am feeling tired, but plan to do some exercise when I get home after service.  I have to start planning out my week so that I don't fall into last minute scrambling for dinner and then shooting off to do something for church/family/school.

I ask for God's strength and discipline to be with me this week!!!  It is going to be a good week.  Hope it will be for you all...

Day 3 of 12 week Challenge "Ch4ng3 4LYF"

Oh my goodness...I do hope these posts will share something more positive.  Well another day of 3 litres of water...honestly the number of times I had to go to the ladies!!!!!   Today I fasted until 3pm.  Our church is fasting for God's blessing and favour over our programmes for the year....so how about more first one for the year was on the wrong day! Oh well..the intention is there...and God knows my heart....I just didn't know the right day :P....

Went out to dinner tonight to celebrate Dan's last day at work before he starts contracting.  So exclamation marks again!!!!!  But tomorrow will be a new day. I'm glad that I don't feel bloated or anything.  But I do aim to do some exercise this weekend.  I am working tomorrow.  Another full day which I am not looking forward to because it really is taking its toll on my body and in my mind I'm thinking that I have so much to do at home and my little side projects for church and my photography I really need to get get some headspace.

So here's for tomorrow where my post I'm hoping will be better!!!!

Will keep 'FIGHTING'!!!!!!! (with exclamation marks!)

ARGH!!!! Day 2 of my 12 week challenge!!!

I had my mind set to tackle the first of what will be 3 x 12 week challenges I will participate in this year and !!!!! I feel more bloated than ever!!!  One positive is that I am drinking 3Ls water a day now.  That is going down easy.  But argh!!!  My meals when I get home!!!!  is that enough exclamation marks for you!!!  I am kicking myself for eating more.  In my head I can see myself being healthier, graduated, with child (:p) and happy!!! But like my cousin says (who has completed 3 x 12 week challenges) it's the starting that's always hard!!!!

I aimed to get to bed by 10.30pm but nope am still up....My little side projects are keeping me up.  I changed into my workout gears straight after work with the intention that when I got home I will hit the crosstrainer...argh!!! no joy...I must get up early to do something...I know that once I do some activity I will feel better for it.  I am back into cooking meals at home and packing my lunch for work so that is good I suppose.

I am at my largest ever in size and definitely feel this is the year to find myself again!!! and get back to the active person I was when I met Dan.... :)  Well my school books arrived today so I am going to hit the books early before the semester starts so I have a head start on things.  It's going to be a busy first quarter of the year but I am trying to stay positive.

I have enjoyed my time with Bethany today.  She seems positive.  I was conscious of how I interact with my girls today and not act like such a busy body that mummy has to cook, to do the washing, to get their clothes ready etc.  And I can see such a difference in her.  I need to spend more quality time with her and Mira.

So tomorrow is a new day!!! I'll aim to get up early and start again!!!....I will make a better effort to blog my progress too....

See you tomorrow :)

Reminiscing....

It is a public holiday today for Wellingtonians.  What started off as a grim day turned out to be really nice.  Clear blue sky.  Our church had a bbq and volleyball.  With not feeling well lately, today I could feel something that was making me uncomfortable.  I took some panadol and waited it out.  I was hoping to play some volleyball to get some exercise in today.  Everyone seemed to be having some fun.  But unfortunately it didn't seem to get any better.  So here I am back home and I felt compelled to read over the first few entries of my blog.  It has been 8 months now since I started writing this blog and yet I don't feel like I am completely out of the woods.Which stinks because we have 3 x biggest loser challenges scheduled for this year, and I really wanted to work hard.  I suppose I can still try but do it at a slower pace.

As I read through my blog I am reminded of how hard it was for me to feel ill and not knowing what was going on with my body.  Through my words I could see the impact/effects this illness was having on my family.  I think back to the time I wrote this blog.  I never really understood how it effected people until I received private messages of kind thoughts and tears from my dear friends and family.  It was so heart-warming.  Even today I am reminded to continue writing.

I am blessed that you are still with me on this journey...

Week 3 into 2011...

I was reminded by my sister-in-law to hurry up and add a new post! :) so here I am.

Since December I have been involved in our church's Family Portrait Fundraiser.  We were very successful and gained a lot of interest in Auckland.  So last week saw me and my youngest sister-in-law fly to Auckland for 4 days to hold our fundraiser there.  Wow what a busy weekend.  I was so tired by the time we hit Sunday.  I was trying to get as much rest as I could in between times but I couldn't feel my legs at one point from all the standing!  The fundraiser was a success and we had achieved what we set out to do.  We met a lot of beautiful families and reunited with a few.

It was a great opportunity to work alongside my family who pulled together and did a great job!!!  I felt so blessed.  On Sunday it was my first paid gig as the main photographer for my best friend's older brother's wedding. ha! mouthful.  I was glad that it was an intimate setting.  Such a beautiful couple and very much in love.

Here are a few pics taken from the weekend.

I really do feel the strain on my body when I've done so much.  I feel so motivated to do things as the photography has been a success.  But again my health has been made 3rd, 4th priority.  Now after a week at work I am keen to get back into exercising again.

There are some great things ahead this year for my family.  With Dan returning to contacting it will relieve pressure on me having to go to work.  I can finally finish my studies this year!!!  I look forward to wearing my cap and gown for my family and my girls!!!

Tomorrow I'll be spending some much needed time with my girls.  Just me and my girls.  So tonight I cleaned my house so that tomorrow will be dedicated to them.  As I cleaned bathroom number #3 :), I felt really blessed and found myself worshipping Him even in that moment.  Despite all that I lack in my spiritual life, God continues to bless my family.  Never had we imagined to be living in such a beautiful home that would accommodate our big families and He has answered our prayers!!!

The theme that runs through my mind at the moment is about "preparing my fields".  I see myself as a worker in the fields.  Working to bring people to know about God through my actions, my character, my knowledge of Him.  I need to prepare my fields for the rain.  Our Lord could arrive at any time when we least expect it and I want to be ready!!

Our God is an awesome God and He is so wonderful.  Though my behaviour at times does not reflect that I believe He is wonderful, but in my Heart He will always remain!!

2011.....New start.....

The fourth day of the new year is drawing to a close.  My goals to improve my health is going well having gone for walks.  Today I walked for 1.5 hours.  I managed to get some quiet time with God during a 5 min break.  I was meant to walk with some family members but they hadn't woken up on time so I thought to go ahead.  No more excuses.  Having had only 4 hours sleep and getting up before 7am, I did okay.  I've been feeling so bloated lately.  I won't let that deter me from hitting the pavement.  I've been really motivated by another friend who has already lost 30 kgs.  His faith and action is getting him through the challenges he participates in.    So at this stage I'm positive that I can keep at it.  Work starts next week so I will start hitting the gym again.

My house is now ready for our Auckland guests to arrive tomorrow.  I'm looking forward to spending some time with my cousin and her family.  I've been very fortunate, very blessed that my family over the past 7 months have had the opportunity to come down and visit/support us.  I look forward to many more opportunities God has prepared for us this year.  

The Word over the weekend talked about understanding that we are no longer orphans but we have a Father in Heaven who loves us unconditionally.  A great reminder that even in our loneliest of times, we are not alone.  I love hearing the scripture about Jesus telling Simeon to caste his nets out into the sea.  Through obedience and faith the nets were filled beyond what they could contain.  Like our plans we can never fully understand why God asks us to do things, but it's with faith and action do we see the blessings.  "Faith and Action".  Like James 2:17 NIV says...faith without action is dead.  I can serve as much and as hard as I can but if my faith isn't in its right place then what's the point.  I have just wasted my time.  Even with the exercising I'm reminding myself to use the time to have a conversation with God.  My friend reminded me that by keeping my "temple" in good health, I can live a longer therefore serving Him more.

I don't really feel that I've had a break these Christmas/New Year Holidays.  All the late nights are self-inflicted of course.  My house is in order which is good but I still feel like I need some sort of release.  I'm certain my time will come to download or shout out :).  

I do love my life, my husband and my girls.  I do think I need to work on showing my affection more.  Coming from a staunch family, I do feel awkward at times when showing affection.  I sometimes have the mentally that I don't have time to hug my husband because I have dinner to cook, the laundry to clean.  I always have at the back of my mind, an email that I received about a mother writing a letter to their child apologising for the little time they have together etc.  I do try to give my girls the attention they want/need.  I do see a positive change in their behaviour when I listen to what their needs are.  Often we focus so much more on outside relationships that we overlook the important relationships that are right under our noses.  I ask for God's strength and patience to persevere with the important relationships in my life.