Day 46 - At least the weather is improving... :)

Wellington weather doesn't seem to bad this morning.  But then again I haven't stepped outside yet.
I managed to sleep right through the night.  Just woke a short while ago.  So Mrs Doubtfire returned to her family this morning.  Am going to miss her :).  Love you Ben.  My girls didn't want their uncle to leave.  Today it's just me and Mrs Doubtfire's apprentice..Bethany :).  I told her that once she got out of bed this morning she is to make the bed and her response was "Yes Mummy.  Yes Mummy I will do whatever you want me to do" aha! that's how we like it :) nice prompt clear and submissive responses :).

It was a full-on day for me yesterday and I thank God that my sleep wasn't disturbed by any jolts of pain.  Thank you everyone for your prayers.  I am just going to rest and relax and later in the afternoon make a start on my studies for this semester.

I was browsing through my library of diaries.  Well not really a library more like a singular bookshelf of books :)  Most of which are notebooks of sermons I had heard over the years.  I came across something I wrote, on 22 January 2004.  It says: "Its been a while since I've read my book "Becoming a Woman of Passion".  Just read a perspective on Peter walking on the water.  How he stayed focused on Jesus, but as soon as he looked at the surging waves he began to sink.  We need to take our focus off ourselves and our circumstances and stay focussed on the Lord.  1 Thessalonians 5: 16 - 18 "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."  Keep an ongoing conversation with God."

A simple message about staying focussed on Him and you will stay above the surging waters.  Nothing complicated about that really.  We tend to think that God's Word is complex.  But we make it complex.  At times I would say to my girls "You make it harder for yourself."  And we do the same with God's Word.  Why?  So it is easier for us not to try?  But trying always brings a closer to God.  We don't move anywhere when we don't try.  A thought for you and me...

Well, Mrs Doubtfire's apprentice just walked into the room with her breakfast, jam toast, milk with a banana flavoured sippah straw and coloured popcorn. :)  She is sitting across the table from me eating the breakfast that she made.  Amazing how quickly your child can feel they want to be independent by doing things for themselves.  Bethany is only 6 years old and she can already do most things for herself.  Her sister is quickly following behind her on the independence scale.  The joys of parenthood.

Again I came across a few people over the last couple of days who asked me about my illness.  Seeing me standing in front of them it appears that there is nothing wrong with me.  So you can imagine how difficult it is for me to describe my condition, while standing in front of them looking there is nothing wrong with my body.  When this situation happens, Thomas one of Jesus' disciples pops into my head.  After Jesus died he reappeared to his disciples and all but one, Thomas, believed that Jesus returned.  Thomas declared to the other disciples that only when he touches Jesus' wounds will he believe.  Jesus reappeared and told Thomas to touch his wounds.  Thomas fell to his knees and believed that Jesus had returned.  In this experience I think about how difficult it is for us to describe a God who is very much alive to us but is unseen and convince others how great He is in our lives.  I feel a little disheartened when I describe my illness to people and their facial expressions tell me they still don't quite understand.  People are that way when we describe our God to them.  But the nurses and doctors then reassured me as they did yesterday that there is nothing wrong with me and that I am completely sane.  Praise God for the experiences he takes us through to show us that it is not easy but we can pull through and find ways to talk about His goodness.

In sharing my story with you, it helps me to come to terms with my illness and helps me to positively bounce back when I receive messages from you all.  My story is to show you that even in your lowest times there is someone greater than us that is looking over you and your family and is waiting for that time to talk with you.

God bless everyone...and I hope you have an awesome day today.  Mine is starting out to be a good one!!

p.s. It's my brother and sister-in-law, Junior and Angela's wedding anniversary today.  Happy anniversary guys love you greatly!

6.31pm

I'm really tired.  Had like a 45 mins nap before my mother-in-law arrived and took Bethany away for a couple of hours so that Bethany can spend some time with her sister at their nana's house.

My girls will once again spend the night at their Uncle Veta's house.  I'll miss them tonight.  Nothing much more to share tonight.  All I feel like doing is hopping back into bed.

I hope that you and your families enjoy the start of your weekend.  Be safe and stay warm.

God bless